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How to sleep with an elbow in your ear

Sleep With an Elbow in your Ear

AKA: sleeping with you kid while home for the holidays. We have been home at mom’s for 5 days and I have had to develop some strategies to deal with the teeth grinding, double leg covers kick off, the infamous “star” shape in the middle of the bed, and, as demonstrated above, the horizontal shuffle.

Since I have been battling them all for the past few days, I figured I would help you all out as you head home and possibly, most definitely, experience the same thing.

1. Teeth Grinding: I love my child, but the sound that emanates from her when she grinds her teeth at night makes me want to run away! It is completely random and unpredictable! There is no reasoning or time out with a sleeping child and it is so frustrating! In exasperation the other day, I pushed her to the other end of the bed where she stayed sleeping on her side. For some reason, sleeping on the side makes it harder to grind those teeth! Holding the mouth shut does not work!

2. Double-Leg Covers Kick off: My child has the super power of making her legs as stiff and strong as steel. When she wants to kick off covers, she invokes said super power, lifts both legs up at the same time until they reach the top of the covers, and then WHAM! she slams them down on the bed; thereby pulling all the covers off! A WHOOSH of cold air wakes  you up as you begin to wrestle the covers back. There are warning signs before lift off that you can counter-act. When you feel the legs gaining momentum, grab as much of the covers as you can and hold on to them with your hands, legs, body…anything that will keep the covers on you!

3. Star Shape: I have no idea how she knows where the middle of the bed is while she is sleeping, but somehow she finds it just before stretching into star shape. Only, she cannot get full extension of one of her arms because your head is in the way and the elbow gets wedged into your ear. Again, her super power of creating frozen stiffness sets in within seconds and the challenge is gathering the appendages together at the same time to roll her onto her side. Warning, if you lose an arm or leg in the process, she will pop back into Star shape again and you will have to start over!

4. The Horizontal Shuffle: These little buggers are fast and can move into position in lightening speed. I got up last night for a quick drink of water and came back to find her sprawled across the bed in the combination of Horizontal Shuffle in face down Star shape.That’s the WORST! You have to lift them from the front and their backs just don’t bend well to move back to their own side. It becomes a shift and pull, shift and pull, this way and that way until you have room to even get back into bed.

As much as it can be frustrating to sleep, I cherish all the night adventures because someday it will all be a distant dream. What I love about sleeping with her is noticing and remembering that she still wakes up just like she did as a baby: stretching like a kitten, right arm first extending, then the left with the slightly arching of the back as her head turns to face me and smile. That’s what makes it all worth it!

Merry Christmas! May Santa bring you restful sleep over the holidays!

Can you relate? Tell me how!